Finally, we’ve come to the end of our journey! But don’t fret; this is the best lesson of all. Why? Because this is where you learn to keep your friends close, and your enemy closer!
This course has not been about killing off your Saboteur, or beating him/her into submission; use him for your own good! Remember, at the end of the day, the Saboteur Within is there to protect you. It doesn’t think, it just does; it’s like a mercenary, hired to do a job no matter what that job is.
Never misinterpret me to think that “I Am” statements are necessarily “bad” things; only when they’re self-limiting do such statements hold us back. In the last lesson, “I am an unhappily married woman” led to chaos and confusion, which ultimately led to a NEW “I Am” statement – “I Am a happily single woman” – that led to happiness, challenge and infinite possibilities.
So the goal becomes not to kill off the Saboteur but to use that energy, power and capacity of the unconscious mind to rewrite your “I Am” statement and use the Saboteur to protect and defend it in a positive, uplifting way.
Consider how the following “I Am” statements can be turned around and used for good:
By switching “I Am… a smoker” with “I Am… a non-smoker,” you can finally focus on using the Saboteur Within to protect your non-smoking habits.
By switching “I Am… the dumb one in the family” with “I Am… a student in college,” you can finally focus on using the Saboteur Within to ensure you study hard and pass your exams.
By switching “I Am… an unhappily married woman” with “I Am… a happily single lady,” you can finally focus on using the Saboteur Within to support you in your new life on the dating scene.
By switching “I Am… unlovable” with “I Am… lovable,” you can finally focus on using the Saboteur Within to firmly protect your lovable new self. Your Saboteur will now stop you embarking on another disastrous relationship and will now only let you choose a lovable, loving and caring partner.
By switching your “I Am… an overeater” with “I Am… a healthy eater,” you can finally focus on using the Saboteur Within to protect your healthy eating habits and ensure you maintain a fabulous, trim figure.
See how that works? For most of this course we’ve addressed the unconscious mind; the Saboteur Within and how it can create havoc and heartbreak if allowed to run amok, enforcing out of date and out of place rules and restrictions.
Think about it; this is powerful, powerful stuff. Imagine the enemy the most powerful weapon in the world! It was decimating your forces, wiping out all your troops and there was no way to combat it unless… you send in a super-duper secret spy team to steal it and bring it back to your side. Now you can use the enemy’s greatest weapon against itself and win.
In this case, your enemy is the old self-limiting “I Am” statement you’ve been living with for years; I am unlovable, I am stupid, I am meant to be fat, I am a smoker and so on and so on.
And the ultimate weapon, of course, is the Saboteur Within; who is so strong and powerful that the only way to defeat it is to acknowledge it, capture it and reprogram it to protect your new “I Am” statement!
By using the exercise in this course and working with a friend/coach you can redefine who you are, develop a whole new set of “I Am” statements and then put your Saboteur in charge of enforcing them.
I am aware it’s not always easy. That’s why most smokers quit for a little while, then go back. It’s why most diets fail and in fact, many people gain more than they lost in the first place. It’s why women who feel unloved are so resistant to trusting a new man that they typically revert to their old habits of driving him away before they can get hurt again. It’s why millions of people stay in dead-end jobs rather than taking that chance of embracing the entrepreneur within. But it is doable!
One factor that plays heavily in change is giving ourselves the time to change. Remember in the last lesson when I introduced The Three Keys to Transformation:
- You have to want to change
- You have to know how to change
- You have to have the time to change
I know that you want to change; and now you know how to change. The key is to focus on the third aspect of transformation: give yourself the time to change! Remember, there is no expiration date on success, there is no deadline for self-actualisation and, ultimately, the only person you need to please is yourself.
I would like to add an extra piece right about now and that is Give Yourself Permission to Change.
Many clients that I have been fortunate enough to work with have found that “permission” can truly set them free to change. Case in point: Leslie and Carol were both diagnosed with the same type of cancer and both had the same prognosis. Many years later they were both still alive and kicking and yet Leslie had needed much more chemo and additional treatments whilst Carol had made a rapid and uncomplicated recovery. Although the two ladies had inspired each other along the way, Leslie felt bad that she wasn’t recovering as quickly as her comrade.
We worked around the rules laid out in this course and very quickly found that Leslie still held a grudge against someone in her early childhood and hadn’t forgiven him for what he had done.
I explained that I wasn’t able to change her past, but would work with her to change her perception of it. Remember, each thought has a chemical reaction and here was Leslie, 50 years later, still being fed those same poisonous thoughts, deep inside her unconscious mind, courtesy of her Saboteur. All of those toxic thoughts about Leslie not being “whole” were being nurtured and they, in turn, would manifest in to the very thing that she feared most.
It’s maddening when you think about it, isn’t it? There you are wandering around thinking about the terrible thing that you never want to happen to you and BHAM! You open your eyes one day and hey presto! It’s yours!!!
Stop thinking about what you don’t want, because you will only enlist your Saboteur to go out and get it for you! Think about what you do want and let that take up your energy.
Focus on rewriting your “I Am” statements and enlist the Saboteur Within to support you. The keys to success are all inside you; you just have to give yourself permission to set them free!
Hopefully, this course has given you the tools you need to unleash and harness the power of your Saboteur Within!
Congratulations if you have gotten this far and have taken the time to get to know yourself, more. If you have whizzed through the course only searching for gold, on the surface, I hope you got what you wanted. The gems, however, are buried a little deeper and that is why I suggested that you have a friend or a coach support you.
Everyone that I’ve spoken to during the research of my book [that this course is based on] has commented upon the title; each of us on some level recognise the Saboteur Within. I put off finishing this book for years, whilst my Dad was alive, because I told him that he couldn’t go until he had read my book! I used not finishing as a means of keeping him alive that was unfair, “Dad, I know you missed my mam terribly and that you are both happier now.”
Shelle Rose Charvet and I were in a coaching session, when Shelle asked me “What did finishing this book mean to me?”
I felt a weight inside my chest as I saw a gravestone inside my mind. Somehow I had equated completion with my death! And then I was wondering what was preventing me from getting on with writing? What seemed like self-sabotage was really self preservation! My mind had made an association between “completion” and the absolute completion of my life, which I am happy to say, will continue for many years to come.
You will be able to find out more, when I release my next book, “Is That Why You Do This?” which is about the rules that were alive and kicking when you were growing up inside your family home.
Rusty Fischer, helped to coach me through the pages of my book and so a big thank you to you Rusty.
Thank you to my family, friends and to you, whom if we never meet face to face, we have met soul to soul.
Live a simple life and have fun!
“You have the Answer.
Just get quiet enough to hear it”
– Pat Obuchowski